


Everything Unspoken

by Usero



Category: Original Work
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Violence, Consensual Underage Sex, F/M, M/M, Post-Apocalypse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Torture, Rape Aftermath, Rape/Non-con Elements, Suicide Attempt, Torture, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, Underage Kissing, Underage Rape/Non-con, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-28
Updated: 2017-11-25
Packaged: 2019-01-25 20:07:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 13
Words: 18,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12540136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Usero/pseuds/Usero
Summary: Humanity had gone to shit hundreds of years ago, Sirin was just surprised it took this long to end. He was in the army, a fighter pilot. He worked for the government so he knew things weren’t as fine as they seemed. He tried to warn the people at his base, he tried to tell them that the airborne disease that the government scientists created wouldn’t stay in their enemy's countries, they would spread to America, but they didn’t listen. So, the world ended and the apocalypse started. The only thing that mattered was survival.





	1. Chapter 1

Sirin woke with a start, he sat up breathing heavily. He looked around the room searching for something, anything to show him he was ok. He sighed in relief as his eyes studied the clock on his wall and remembered that it was only a nightmare.  _ Same shit different day. _ He thought, as he laid back down, he remembered something his grandmother used to say “ _ Someday this pain will be useful to you and your nightmare will become beautiful.” _ he felt a familiar pang of loneliness in his chest and sighed, every night this happened, him reliving his year as a hostage, all the things that were done to him, and all the things he had to do that made him scared of himself. Then he woke up, alone and broken.

….

When the world went to hell, communications was the first thing to go. The infrastructure collapsed within ten days. TV was the first medium to go, falling in just three days. Too many people got to see the virus hit news anchors and hosts on live TV. The roll TV had played in the spread of mass hysteria had been unparalleled. It had also been how Garth had first seen the effects of Pestilent Mozeria, the virus that ended the world. The virus caused your organs to explode inside your body, animal instinct, an extremely high fever and irresistible urge to eat any and all things that had a pulse, including humans. It was highly contagious through physical contact with the infected’s bodily fluids and once you got sick, you could no longer function as a human, couldn't talk, couldn't think, all the infected did was eat. So with no vaccine and no cure an epidemic broke out and soon the hospitals were too full, the virus was spreading to quickly and soon, the world was over and everyone was on their own. Luckily for Garth, he was in the army, he was protected, and he was told to return the the base as soon as the virus was detected. His teammates Lyla Graham, J.P Rawling, Sirin Moore, and Ava Stall were also told to return. There were 122 others but Garth didn’t know their names, let alone them personally. Actually come to think of it he didn’t know why exactly he had returned, the situation was far from ideal and he probably could have made it better on his own, but maybe he craved the company? He sat up and looked up at the clock, 7:00. He rolled out bed and got dressed. Breakfast would be served soon, even after the world ended they worked hard  to keep a strict schedule and make everything seem normal. He walked out into the hallway and smiled as he saw the familiar blonde haired, green eyed boy walk toward him. “Finally, you're awake” Sirin said, reaching him “Yeah, well we all don’t get up at 3:00 in the morning for god-knows what reason” Garth shot back. “Whatever, let’s go get food.” Sirin said rolling his eyes and walking down the hallway.

….

Sirin looked up to see Garth staring at him, “What?” he asked. Garth looked away “Nothing, it doesn’t matter.” Sirin looked curious but didn’t say anything. “O...kay” he said “So is there an actual reason you get up at like 3am everyday or is it just a personal preference” Sirn sighed “Nope I just do it because…. I have a lot of, lieutenant things to do.” Garth rolled his eyes “Ya, right, are you almost done I want to leave.” he said gesturing toward Sirin’s full plate. “Oh ya I’m done” they stood up and took their plates to the trash. “I have to go see a group on a run” Sirin said turning away from Garth and walking down the hall. Garth reached out and grabbed his arm “Wait see you later?” Sirin turned back to look at Garth “Sure, I guess” Garth smiled and let Sirin leave. Sirin sighed as he walked away.  _ Jeez, what’s his deal.  _ He thought as he walked back to his dorm, he would deal with the run later. Sirin never wanted to be friends with Garth, actually he wanted the opposite. When Garth first came to the base there were dozens of people who wanted to be friends with him, but for some reason he only wanted to be friends with Sirin. It was mostly a one-sided friendship, with Garth doing all the work. After a while, Sirin thought he would take the hint and move on to someone else, but he never did. He kept insisting that they hang out, in the dorms, in the cafeteria, pretty much anywhere. Them hanging out was really just them sitting in silence, with Garth occasionally asking him questions. As he approached his dorm, he saw J.P Rawling leaning on the wall outside his door. “Sirin, just the man I wanted to see,” he said standing up straight. “Why?” “Let’s go inside, we can talk” Sirin hesitantly walked past him and opened the door. J.P followed him inside. “What did you want to talk abo-” Sirin was interrupted by J.P pushing him to the ground. “Dude what the fuck?” Sirin asked, as he stood back up. J.P pushed him back and kneeled down next to him, tucking his arms underneath his back and pulling out a knife. He placed one of his hands on Sirin’s chest, holding him firmly to the ground. He took the knife and held it up to Sirin’s throat. Sirin smiled “Do it” he said “I should shouldn’t I?” J.P said pressing the knife down, leaving a bright red line across his neck. Sirin nodded “You should but you won’t.” he said confidently. That made J.P push the knife harder, drawing blood. Suddenly, he picked up the knife. “See I told you?” Sirin said trying to sit up. J.P pushed him back down, anger bubbling up as he slashed Sirin’s cheek. “You think you're so smart don’t you?” he said punching Sirin in the stomach, then face. “I deserve to be in charge” every word was followed by another blow to the face. Sirin writhed underneath J.P. “W-Why” Sirin stuttered. J.P laughed and stood up “You’re trash, you know that?” he kicked Sirin in the stomach and walked out the door. Sirin brought his knees to his chest, tears streaming down his face. He had to do something, talk to someone. He sighed as he realized he only knew one person.  _ Will Garth even care? _ He thought as he walked to Garth’s room. It didn’t matter, he had to try. He got to Garth’s room and knocked on his door. “Sirin? What happened?” Sirin stepped into his room and Garth immediately hugged him, Sirin leaned into him and wrapped his arms around Garth’s waist. “What happened?” Garth asked again “J.P, came into my room and...just attacked me.”  _ Why did I come here?  _ Sirin thought suddenly  _ Why would Garth care? _ Sirin pulled away, “Sorry” he said wiping away his tears “I should leave.” he turned toward the door but Garth grabbed his hand. “Why are you here?” He asked quietly “I-...I don’t have anybody and so I thought that maybe, you could be it.” Garth walked toward him until his back was pressed against the door. Then he leaned down and pressed his lips against Sirin’s.”Of course,” he said “You’ll always have me.”  __

….

Sirin shivered as the memories came back and reminded him of his first kiss with Garth. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he thought about the possibility of never having that again. He heard the sound of boots clicking on the outside of, wherever he was. They stopped outside his cell and a deep voice said, “This is the one?” “Yep, bring him to the boss” another voice said.  _ It’s ok, be strong you’ve been through worse.  _ He told himself while he heard the men unlocking the cell he was in. As he was dragged out, he heard a laugh all to familiar. 


	2. Chapter 2

He turned around to see his old teammate, J.P Rawling laugh. They were standing in the Captain's office, debriefing after their latest assignment. “Why are you laughing, Rawling?” the Captain shouted “You’re really going to appoint him?” he yelled gesturing toward Sirin. Sirin opened his mouth to argue but was interrupted by the phone on Captain Rivalli’s desk ringing. She picked it up “Hello? Yep we are prepared,” her face dropped and she cleared her throat, “Ok. Yes. I’ll tell them. Goodbye.” she hung up the phone and looked at J.P “Yes I am really appointing him and if you have an issue you can leave.” she turned to Sirin, “Lieutenant Moore, we have a meeting to go to.” she stood up “Um, ok” Sirin followed her out the door. After the meeting, he walked back to his room and found Garth waiting for him, “Hey,” Garth said “Hi” Sirin answered and walked past him to unlock his room, “You want to go somewhere and hang out?” Garth asked hopefully. Sirin really didn’t but he knew Garth wouldn’t go away until he said yes “No, but do you want to come in? We can just hang out in my room” Garth smiled and followed him inside. Sirin sat down on his bed, Garth hovering awkwardly by the door until he finally relaxed and sat down “So, uh, what did you do today?” Garth asked “I got appointed to Lieutenant, so I guess that’s cool” he said “Are you kidding? That’s  amazing, congratulations.”  _ Why did I say anything.  _ He nodded his thanks, sighing. Garth stayed a little longer then looked up at the clock. “Oh sorry I have to go, I am working in the infirmary. See you later.” he stood up and walked to the door. 

….

Garth closed the door and walked to the infirmary. He was organizing the medicine cabinet and taking inventory when a guy walked in, “Hey, so you're the doctor today?” “Uh, yep.” Garth turned around to see his old friend Clay Walker. They had been friends when Garth first got to the base but Clay ditched him for some girl. “What do you need?” Clay sat down on the table “I was just wondering if you had any prenatal vitamins” “Um, I don’t think so, I don’t really know what that is.” he checked the cupboard, “Nope, but I’ll put it on the list.” Clay nodded and walked out. As Garth organized the infirmary, his mind wandered until he eventually he ended up thinking about Sirin.  _ Should I leave him alone like he wants?  _ He thought as he started cleaning the floors,  _ I just want him to be ok. _

….

Garth smiled at the memory, nothing had changed except now he _ needed _ Sirin to be ok. A woman knocked on his door and entered his, new house? “Hello Garth how are you doing?” she asked “Well about as good as a captive can get.” he said back “You are not a captive Garth.” Garth raised his eyebrows “Then why can’t I leave?” the woman smiled, “We are hoping that you will not want to leave.” “I do want to leave, I don’t know anybody here and you guys kidnapped me and Sirin.”  _ Sirin  _ “Where is he?” Garth asked “Where is who” the woman asked. Garth rolled his eyes “Sirin, the man I was with.” “Oh, our leader has given us special instructions for that man.” “O...kay  well can I see him?” “Ah, of course not.” she stood up and walked to the door “What, why?” she opened the door and stepped out “I will send someone with your food rations soon.” she said, closing the door behind her.  _ What the hell?! _ Garth looked out the window and searched for any signs of life or happy people, anything to prove to him that his gut was wrong, that this was a good place, but he didn’t find anything.  After about an hour, there was a knock on the front door and a young man opened it. “Hi” he said when he saw Garth, who nodded in response. “I brought your food rations.” he said handing Garth a piece of paper. “Oh, paper, my favorite.” Garth said sarcastically. The man smiled, “That’s your ration ticket, you have to go to the square and get food just like everyone else. I can show you where it is.” “Ok, thanks um-” “Ben .” he answered “Thanks, Ben.” “So how did you find this place?” Ben asked as they walked to the square “Oh you know the normal way, my teammate and I were kidnapped.” Ben looked at the ground  “Me too” he said quietly. They got their place in line and eventually got food. As they walked back to Garth’s house some guys came up and started talking to Ben in Japanese. Garth thought nothing of it until one of the guys started yelling and pushed him the ground. “Hey!” Garth stepped in, and the others pushed him down too. The biggest one, presumably the leader, kicked Ben in the stomach and he walked off, Garth shivered as he thought of Sirin and J.P. He got up and offered a hand to Ben. “You ok man?” Ben nodded “Yeah, happens everyday,” “Everyday!? Wait, if you were kidnapped then how come you get to roam free?” “I became a citizen.” “Oh, then how come they beat you up everyday?” “To show dominance? I don’t know can we go back to your house?” “Ya, sure” the minute they entered Garth’s house and shut the door, he started asking more questions, “So then why do you stay here?” “I can’t leave, once you are chosen to be in the community you have to stay or they’ll….kill you.” Garth shuddered and started thinking of a way, any way that he could escape.  _ I could probably make it out but I have no idea where Sirin is, I can’t just leave him. What if he already left and I am here alone? What if he tried to leave and got caught and they killed him?  _ He was worrying so much that he didn't realize that Ben was watching him anxiously. “You're going to try and escape huh?” Ben said after a while of watching Garth. Garth nodded, “Can I come?” Garth looked at him warily. “Maybe”


	3. Chapter 3

“What do you know about the recon mission?” The man asked. He pulled out his blade and sharpened it. “Nothing, I don’t know anything about it” Sirin said, his voice shaky. The man snorted “Of course you do, you’re part of it, we would have your plane and all of the information on it, but you blew it up right before we captured you.” the man snorted, “Biggest mistake of your life.” he put the knife to the side and tightened his hand and foot restraints. Then he picked up the knife again and cut into Sirin’s stomach. Sirin screamed and the man smiled and continued asking him questions. Every time Sirin didn’t answer a question or insulted the man he earned another cut. This continued on until his chest was full of cuts and blood was pouring down his body, he still wouldn’t tell the man anything.  
….  
Blue, your favorite color is blue he told himself don’t remember, don’t forget. It's happening again but you can do this don’t forget. “It’s your fault.” J.P said as he tightened the last restraint. “And now, you're going to pay”  
….  
Garth walked into Sirin’s room, he was still asleep and Garth kneeled down beside the bed and kissed him. Sirin opened his eyes and smiled “Hi, wait what time is it?” “2:30, I know you need to sleep but, we are leaving for the run in ten minutes, the other guys are already waiting outside.” Sirin scooted over in his bed and patted for Garth to lay down. Garth laid next to him and Sirin wrapped his arms around Garth’s middle, “We really have to go,” Garth said after about five minutes of them laying like that. “Ya, I know” he reluctantly got up, grabbed his stuff, and went outside to meet the other guys.  
….

“What,” Sirin took a deep breath “What is my fault” “Everything, the fact that Ava is dead, the fact that Lyla left me, the fact that I didn’t get lieutenant, it's your fault.” J.P took out a pack of matches and lit one, Sirin braced himself as J.P pushed it into his skin. Come on you can do this he thought you’ve been through worse. Sirin, that’s my name, Sirin Ito Moore. J.P continued lighting the matches and burning him until the pack was gone. Then he pulled out his knife and started slashing his arms, then stomach, then legs. Sirin cried out in pain and J.P’s laugh was the last thing he heard, right before he blacked out.  
….  
They had split up into groups and started on their run. Sirn and Garth had already found half the stuff on the list after the first three stops and had set up camp by an old railroad. Garth sat beside Sirin “Let’s talk” he said grabbing Sirin’s hand “Ok what do you want to talk about?” Garth shrugged but his voice got a serious tone “We could talk about when you were a hostage.” he knew it was risky and he probably wouldn’t talk about it, but he wanted to try. He felt Sirin stiffen “Why?” “Maybe it could help you” “I don’t really remember it, I went through so much trauma I lost my memory.” “You don’t remember anything?” “I have nightmares that my subconscious remembers” he answered quietly “How often?” “Every time I go to sleep.” “That’s why you don’t” Sirin nodded, and stared at the ground “I’m sorry shouldn’t have brought it up” He nodded again then jumped as the butt of a gun hit the back of his head. That’s the last thing Garth remembered before his world went black.   
….  
Garth woke suddenly as his door was broken down, and two huge guys stormed in, led by Ben. “Ben? What’s going on?” “Sorry Garth but I couldn’t let you just try to escape” “What? I trusted you I can’t believe this” he shouted “Believe it Garth, you could’ve had a good life here but you screwed it up, and for what, your friend? Big mistake,” he nodded to the guys “Take him” the guys grabbed Garth and dragged him out outside and toward a plain field. Are they going to shoot me? Garth kept thinking. They dragged him for about thirty more minutes and they eventually arrived at a huge industrial building the men dragged him inside and down a long hallway full of different rooms. They threw him in one of the rooms. This is a cell, great. He thought as he sat down in one corner of the cell.  
….  
When Sirin woke up he was back in his cell. He couldn’t move and every breath was followed by excruciating pain. My name is Sirin Ito Moore, my favorite color is blue. He repeated in his head over and over, so that he didn’t forget, didn’t lose everything again. Suddenly he heard footsteps come down the hallway and stop at his cell. No please not again. He silently pleaded, he couldn’t even speak. He heard more footsteps come down the hallway and stop at his door as well. He closed his eyes and waited. The door opened and several people walked in. J.P laughed when he didn’t turn his head to look at them, “Looks like that nerve paralyzer I gave you is working” he turned to one of the men, “Sit him up” Sirin felt a man grab him and roughly throw his back up against the wall. He opened his eyes, not that it helped, the room was pitch black and the only figure he could make out was J.P. “Turn on the light” he shouted. Sirin blinked as his eyes adjusted to the sudden brightness. He looked around the room and saw J.P and three huge guys, two of which were holding up an unconscious man by his arms. “Who is that?” he asked his voice barely audible. J.P stepped closer to Sirin, “Here’s the next part of your torture, enjoy.” the men dropped the guy who was unconscious and all four of them walked out, leaving the light on. Inch by inch Sirin’s body slid back down, until he was flat on the floor again. He sighed, here’s the next part of your torture, what could torture me more than not being able to move with pain searing through my body, and open cuts everywhere, trying not to forget myself and my life...again. He wished he could at least turn his head so he could see who the man was, he could maybe muster up the strength, but he was too scared, to scared to scream out for help, to scared to sleep, to scared to do anything but breathe and repeat, My name is Sirin Ito Moore, my favorite color is blue. After about six hundred more times, he heard the man across the room stir. A little at first, then he sat up and gasped. Sirin could just barely see out of the corner of his eye. He sat still for a moment, then looked around. His eyes landed on Sirin and he got up and slowly walked over. “Holy shit,” the man grabbed him as soon as he saw his face and Sirin remembered, it was Garth.


	4. Chapter 4

Garth sat down next to Sirin and pulled him into his lap. Sirin winced at every movement and touch. “I’m sorry” he said “Can you speak?” “Yeah” Sirin whispered. Garth started crying. “Stop, what’s wrong” Garth looked over his body, the burns, the cuts, and got his tears to slow down. He stayed silent for a long time “Who is doing this to you?” Sirin closed his eyes “J.P” Garth stiffened “What?” he shouted. Sirin jumped “Sorry, sorry” Garth brought his hand up to Sirin’s face, the only part of his body that wasn’t cut and bleeding. Sirin breathed in, “Can I sleep please?” he whispered. Garth nodded, “Of course.” he kissed Sirin’s cheek and let him fall asleep. 

….

Sirin winced as he felt Garth move underneath him. “Sorry” “It’s fine” “Can you move yet?” Sirin tried to wiggle his fingers “No, I can’t.” “Do you want to go back to sleep?” “No, I can’t” Sirin said again. Garth didn’t say anything for a long time “We are gonna get out of here, you're going to be ok” “No he’s not, and neither are you.” J.P walked into the cell. He turned to them, “I did not expect this to happen.” He gestured towards Garth, who was holding Sirin protectively. “Hell, the only reason I brought him in here was so that as you lost your memory you would have a constant reminder of what you would forget” J.P smiled “But now I have so much more option.” He nodded toward the door and a huge guy came in, “Blake, bring Sirin down to the basement in five, I’ll be waiting.” the man nodded and J.P left the room. Blake walked over to them, bent down and picked Sirin up, half tearing him from Garth’s arms. Sirin groaned as Blake threw him over his shoulder and carried him out.  _ No, I can’t do this again, please.  _ He thought as Blake carried him down a large set of stairs, his shoulder digging into Sirin’s stomach every time he took a step. They got to the basement and J.P was waiting for him just like he said. Blake and J.P strapped him to a table then Blake went back upstairs. “So you and Garth huh? How the fuck did that happen?” J.P asked as he sat down. Sirin didn’t answer. “Whatever, I don’t really care. It really benefits me though, I have so many new ideas, but for tonight,” J.P walked to the foot of the stairs and yelled up “Bring him down,” Blake came back down, this time carrying Garth. “Put him in that chair.” J.P pointed Blake did and strapped his wrists to the chair arms. “Why am I here?” Garth asked “It will make it more painful” J.P said smiling “Let’s get started shall we?” he walked into a back room and Blake followed. They came out a minute later, carrying a picana and a bucket of water. “Let’s do this” he nodded to Blake, who threw the bucket of water on Sirin. “Please, don’t” Sirin begged “Begging is pitiful” J.P turned on the picana and shoved it into Sirin’s side, resulting in a scream from both him and Garth. J.P started laughing “Exactly what I wanted” he continued shocking him, turning up the voltage until Sirin passed out from the pain.

….

Garth and Sirin were returned to their cell, Sirin was still unconscious. Garth laid him down and then started pacing.  _ Don’t fall asleep _ he told himself  _ this next part is important. _ He paced for half an hour more and then heard the cell door open. “Finally,  you're here, what happened to ‘I’ll be there as soon as I can.’?” “I did come as soon as I could” Ben said defensively, “The plan worked?” Garth sighed “Yes, the plan worked” “What’s wrong?” Garth sighed again “Nothing, we need to leave as soon as possible.” “Ya, ok, right,” he pulled out a map and spread it out on the floor. Garth sat next to him and they worked out their plan of escape. “You think this is going to work?” Ben asked after they were done with all the plans “Yeah, it has to” “So you found your friend?” Garth smiled softly “Yeah I found him” As if he could hear them, Sirin stirred and rolled over. “So, we should probably get some sleep.” Garth suggested. Ben stood up and walked to the door “Yeah sounds good, see you tomorrow.” he pressed his ear up against the door and listened for footsteps in the hallway, when he didn’t hear anything he opened the door and stepped out turning to wave to Garth before he closed the door behind him. Garth got up and walked over to Sirin, who opened his eyes and smiled. “Why are you smiling?” “Who’s your little friend?” he asked groaning as he sat up. “Hey you can move again,” Garth said sitting down next to him, “Yeah, but seriously who was that?” “Oh, that’s just Ben, he’s going to help us escape.” “What’s the plan? And how did he even get in here?” “I don’t really know how he got in here, he’s tiny and people don’t notice him I guess, and tomorrow there is going to be a big gathering in the square so while J.P and everyone else are at the gathering, Ben will come and unlock our cell so we can escape.” “Where will we go?” Garth shrugged “Where ever you want, I don’t care.” Sirin rested his head on Garth’s shoulder “Thanks Garth” “Let’s try to sleep ok?” “Ok” Garth laid down and moved Sirin next to him. Sirin winced, “Sorry,” “It’s fine.” Sirin answered. Garth pulled Sirin to him and rubbed his back until he fell asleep.

….

Ben waved to Garth and closed the door behind him. He looked down both sides of the hallway and ran down the hall and out the door, making sure to not to be too loud. Once he was outside, he ran back to the community and into Garth’s house, where he had been staying. He grabbed his things and packed them into a bag. Then in another bag, he packed medication, bandages, water, and food. Then he grabbed three sleeping bags, matches, and a tent and put them by the door. It wasn’t much but, they could probably find some more supplies after they got out.  _ Where will we go?  _ He thought as he put the bags by the door  _ They will probably just want to back to where ever they came from and will ditch me in the woods or something. Wouldn't be the first time I was left alone.  _ Ben grabbed an empty bag and left Garth’s house and snuck to the main building of the community, where J.P lived. The house was all quiet  _ J.P must be at the compound.  _ He snuck around the corner into the armory. He loaded the bag with guns and ammo, then snuck back to Garth’s house.

….

“And…..Ava you will be going with J.P.” Sirin finished “Are you guys all ready to go, you have the list and map?” J.P rolled his eyes “Yes dad, we are ready and have everything.” “Ok, well good luck.” “Why do you hate him so much?” Ava asked when they had walked far enough to be out of earshot. “You’re my best friend you should know why I hate him.” “I do, it’s because of…..sergeant...something.” “No, he got lieutenant over me because I made one mistake and he’s the reason Lyla broke up with me.” “So, this whole this is over a girl.” “What whole thing?” “You, like kicking his ass and yelling at him and being a dick, it's all because of Lyla?” “Yeah and the lieutenant thing.” they continued walking in silence until J.P saw saw huge building in the distance. “Hey let’s go check it out.” Ava nodded.

….

Garth woke up to the sound of the cell door opening, it was J.P. He looked at him and smiled, “Good morning,”  Garth didn’t answer and leaned down to wake up Sirin “No,no let him sleep, I’m here for you.” he nodded toward the door, “Let's talk.” “Why?” J.P pulled out a knife “You can come with me, or I can kill you here and Sirin can wake up to your dead body.” Garth sighed and got up. He walked down the hall with J.P. “So what did you want to talk about.” J.P shrugged, “I want you to see that I’m not a bad guy.” Garth felt anger rise in his chest “What?” “I’m not a bad guy” J.P repeated. Garth grabbed him by his shirt and shoved him up against the wall, “You call torturing the person I love in front of me ‘not bad’, you call cutting someone until there is blood all over their body ‘not bad’, you call sticking an electric cattle prod into someone’s side and shocking them until they pass out ‘not bad’?” J.P smiled and continued let Garth hold him up against the wall. “You know how I got this place Garth? I was on a run with Ava, and we saw this place, we hiked to it, and saw a community of like minded people, they had a leader, they were fine, but I could do better. So, I returned to the base and lived normally while working out my plan to attack and kill the leader. Once I did it, I took over, but while we were still at the base, Sirin sent me and Ava out on a run and she was attacked by a sick person and she got sick and now she’s dead. That is why I kidnapped you because Sirin is the one who killed Ava and he deserves to pay.” Garth tightened his grip on J.P’s shirt “Look I’m sorry your girlfriend died, but you don’t get to kidnap and torture him because you need someone to blame, you’re the one who killed Ava, you didn’t protect her and you have to live with that, so you can blame Sirin or me or whoever the hell you want, but the bottom line is, this is your fault.” J.P’s face turned red and he swung at Garth, knocking him to the floor. J.P dropped to the floor as well and climbed on top of him, straddling his waist. He pulled out his knife, and held it against Garth’s chest “How do you feel about dying right here, right now?” Garth “Do what you want” J.P reached over and pulled something off the floor. “Hey, Blake I have a situation I need you to take care of.” he said into the walkie-talkie. Garth moved his arms and tried to get J.P off him but J.P grabbed his hands. “Why do you need Blake to help you, you could just push me back into the cell?” J.P smiled darkly “I don’t need you back in the cell.” Blake walked into the hallway a few minutes later and looked at them quizzically “Am I interrupting something?” J.P got off of Garth “Take him to the basement.” J.P walked back into their cell and Blake took Garth to the basement. They just stood there at the bottom of the stairs and after a few minutes they heard J.P shout something, followed by punching and groaning. Garth tried to run upstairs before anything got to bad, but Blake stopped him. After about ten more minutes of listening, J.P walked downstairs, his knuckles torn and red. Blake took Garth back to the cell and locked them in. Garth ran over to Sirin, who was lying on the floor unconscious. His cuts were bleeding again and his body and face were already bruising. Garth sat down and held Sirin, hoping that somehow, he would be okay. 


	5. Chapter 5

Sirin opened his eyes, “We need to leave, I can’t do this anymore.” “I know I’m so sorry, this is all my fault” “How?” Garth sighed “This morning J.P told me to walk with him so we went out into the hallway and he told me about how he found this place and how he blamed you for Ava’s death and so I shoved him against the wall and told him that it was his fault, but I was just trying to defend you, I didn’t know he was gonna do this.” Sirin nodded  “When is Ben coming?” “Soon I think” “How did you meet him again?” “He brought me food ration tickets and then we got to talking, he got beat up and then we came up with a plan to get me in here so then I could get you and we could escape. That’s why he came to see me last night.” “So, why is he so eager to help us?”  Garth shrugged “It was kinda his idea, I don’t think he has anybody and the people here are awful. So when he figured out that I was going to try to escape, he asked if he could come to.” “So now he’s going to be with us?” “Yeah.” Sirin didn't say anything, he just leaned in and rested his head against Garth’s chest. “Hey you ok?” Sirin shook his head and wrapped his arms around Garth. Garth hugged him back “J.P you ready to go?” said a voice in the hall. Garth leaned down to whisper in Sirin’s ear “Ben will be here soon, are you ready?” “Yeah” he whispered back “Yeah” they heard J.P shout followed by footsteps down the hall. Garth sighed in relief as the door to the compound slammed shut. He pulled Sirin away from him, even in in the dark Garth could see the tears in his eyes. “Hey, your going to be alright, we are going to be alright.” Sirin didn’t say anything and the cell door opened. Ben walked in carrying several bags, he tossed three to Garth, who dropped them and then helped Sirin stand up.  “You ready man?” Ben asked “Yep,” Garth replied. “So how do we know we can trust you?” Sirin asked “Well, I helped Garth get in here, and I’m here now helping you escape” “This could be a trap” Sirin’s voice sounded angry “It’s fine, we can trust him” Garth interrupted “Where do we go from here?”  “Oh, right, we can’t leave through the front entrance, so we have to go down into the basement, out the door and then up the back stairs, then we go across the field, into the woods and we’re free.” Garth nodded and looked at Sirin, he was staring at the ground. Garth touched his shoulder, “Let’s go” “Yeah, right” he answered walking to the door.

….

“Come on,” Ben whispered as they ran across the field and into the woods. They had made it out. His plan had worked, now all they had to do was find somewhere safe to live. Ben stopped walking after they made it into a clearing in the woods “So, where do you guys want to go now?” he asked turning to look at Garth. Instead of answering, Garth walked over and hugged him, “Thank you so much Ben.” “Thank you, if you hadn’t had come, I would never had the courage to escape.” Garth pulled away and smiled, then turned and looked at Sirin who was lurking awkwardly in the shadows. “Yeah, uh thanks.” Ben nodded “So do you want to set up here?” “Sure” Garth answered Ben gave them each a sleeping bag, then went to start a fire. Sirin grabbed the rest of the supplies and walked deeper into the woods. “Hey where are you going?” “If there are animals and we leave the food by us, they will come into our camp, so I will go and tie it to a tree. Don’t start a fire, that will attract animals to and if J.P comes looking for us they will see the fire and attack us in our sleep.” Ben nodded and put down the matches,  _ Wow he sure knows a lot about this stuff. _ He grabbed the tent and Garth helped him set it up. “What’s your friend’s name?” Ben asked after Sirin was out of earshot “Sirin” “Sirin,” Ben repeated ”I don’t think he likes me.” “What? Of course he likes you.” Garth lied “Yeah right.” Ben stayed silent for a while. “So, the tent is pretty small, it was the only one I could carry, with all of this other stuff, but you can have it if you want.” Garth shook his head “It’s cool, we can share.” he said as Sirin came back into camp. He nodded to them then sat down with his back against a tree. “Are you going to go to sleep?” Ben asked “I’ll keep watch” “Are you sure because-.” “Yes, it’s fine” “See he doesn’t like me” he mouthed to Garth “Yes he does.” Garth mouthed back, then he turned to Sirin,“Come on let’s take a walk.”


	6. Chapter 6

Garth and Sirin walked away from Ben and the camp “This isn’t about Ben is it?” Garth asked after a while “No, it’s just,” Sirin sighed “I don’t know if I can ever be ok again” “What do you mean?” Sirin stopped walking “Before this, before us, I was in a really bad place, I couldn't eat or sleep and I didn’t care about anything anymore. Then this happened” he gestured in between them “and I was better, I mean I still had anxiety and PTSD, but most of the time it wasn’t that bad, and when it was, you were there, but now I have even more to remember and I don’t want to put you through it so....” his voice trailed off and he looked at the ground. Garth slowly ran his fingertips up the younger man's arm, finally reaching his face caressing his jaw. "God, I love you." It came out before he could stop it, and Garth couldn't help but cringe a little, but then Sirin was devouring his mouth and he can't think straight anymore. "Say it again," Sirin pulled away to look Garth in the eyes."I love you," Garth whispered, shaking. "I did before all of this." Sirin moaned and hid his face in Garth's neck. "God, I tried so hard not to, but it was fucking hopeless from the start. I love you, Garth. I love you more than I can say."  
….  
“Remember to be nicer to Ben, please” Garth reminded him as they walked back to camp “I’ll be nice but I’m not sleeping in a tent with him and I’m not telling him about my…..issues.” “It’s not your fault, you didn’t choose to have PTSD, but remember that you don’t have to do it by yourself, I’m always here.” Sirin smiled softly, “I know.” they walked back into camp and Sirin made his way over to Ben “Um, I’m...I’m sorry for snapping at you earlier.” Ben smiled “Thanks, that means a lot” Sirin went back to sitting against the tree and Garth and Ben went into the tent. “You told him to be nice and made him apologize didn’t you?” Ben whispered “No, I told you he likes you.” “I’m sorry to say this because he’s like your best friend or whatever.” Garth nodded. They had agreed not to tell Ben about their relationship unless he asked. “But he’s not the type of guy to apologize and he’s definitely not the type of guy to go out of his way to be nice.” Garth shrugged, “I don’t know what to tell you man, maybe you read him wrong.” Ben didn’t say anything, he just layed down and closed his eyes. “Thanks again for helping us escape” “No problem.” he mumbled sleepily   
….  
Sirin paced as he heard Ben and Garth whispering in the tent and he couldn’t help but wonder what they were talking about. He sighed and sat back down as everything went quiet. He grabbed a flashlight and gun from one of the bags that Ben brought and started walking away from camp. He walked at least four miles from camp and circled back. As he approached camp again, he saw Garth outside, waiting for him. He turned around and smiled when he heard Sirin approach, “Hey, I was wondering when you would be back.” he said, walking over to him. “Sorry I just went for a walk.” Garth wrapped his arms around Sirin’s waist and furrowed his brow, “You ok?” he asked gently, like if he spoke to loud or harshly he would break him. Sirin shook his head and leaned towards him. Garth pulled him into his chest and hugged him tightly. Ask him to tell you. Garth told himself. Ask him to tell you what’s wrong, ask him to tell you all of his secrets, just ask him to tell you everything. “Sirin…can I kiss you?” because that was something he should ask for, because he would not push for anything Sirin did not want to give him, but wanted to be clear about how he felt in that moment. He stepped back and looked Garth in the eyes. Sirin’s weight shifted and blush spread from his cheeks to cover most of his face. Garth couldn’t help the smile spreading over his own face when Sirin’s tongue darted out to unconsciously wet his lips. Tugging on his arm, Sirin pulled him closer, and Garth released a breathy chuckle, feeling drunk. The trees shifted and Garth leaned down. Garth slid an arm around his waist and pressed closer, feeling Sirin’s lips moving tentatively, softly, against his. He was sure he could feel his heart swelling in his chest and he smiled gently.“You ok?” he whispered again. Sirin’s hand came up to rest against the side of his face and he nodded, already leaning up to kiss him again, this time with a bit more certainty. When they finally pulled apart they were both breathing hard, the blush had receded from Sirin’s face. Garth pressed a kiss to his shoulder, then to the side of his neck, smiling when it earned him a huff of laughter. He pressed a kiss to his jaw, then to his cheek and then to his smiling lips. When Garth looked back at him, he was smiling again. Garth knew right then and there that he was well and truly done for. “I love you, Sir,” he said plainly, because he needed to, because he wanted to make sure that Sirin knew it. “I have…for ages and, uh…I just wanted to tell you...again. You don’t have to feel obligated to say it back,” he rushed to reassure, “I mean I know you might not…be…in the same place especially with this” he gestured to Sirin’s body, which was cut and horribly bruised “Garth,” Sirin firmly interrupted him. “Like I said, I’ve loved you for a very long time,” he told him bluntly. But then his eyes dropped, his confidence suddenly slipping away. “I’m sorry that I’ve been…that I can’t seem to get better all the way.” Sirin might have kept going, if Garth hadn’t started to frantically shake his head and crowd closer, reaching down to cup his face in his hands.“Sirin – Sirin, god…no.” he tilted his chin up, waited till he looked Garth in the eyes. “Sir, there is nothing wrong with you. You are perfect just the way you are.” He took Sirin’s hands in his and kissed them, “You are strong and kind and amazing and brilliant and I don’t want you to doubt that ever.” he looked like he very much did doubt it and Garth’s heart throbbed painfully in his chest. Was all this too much for him to believe right now? He stared into Sirin’s eyes, trying to communicate things he couldn’t say with words. Garth let his thumb brush a tear off Sirin cheekbone and tried to read everything he could see on his face. “You believe me, right?” he asked, sounding desperate even to himself, but this – this he needed Sirin to understand now. “Sir, please, tell me you understand how much I love you. Please, tell me you understand how kind and beautiful your heart is. Tell me you understand that you’re good and whole just as you are.” He could have kept going, had at least a hundred more words to describe how great he was, but Sirin was starting to look overwhelmed, like he couldn’t even process such blatant praise being directed at him, and Garth had to tell himself to calm the hell down. I have time, he told himself, Even if he doesn’t know it now, there’s no rush. I have time. We have time. Finally. “Garth…” Sirin trailed off, blinked and tried again. “Garth…” ,definitely overwhelmed. Garth shook his head gently, leaning in to press another kiss to his lips and when he felt Sirin melt into him, he could breathe again. When he pulled away, Sirin stared up at him like he could see the stars in his eyes. Both of them jumped when they heard a throat clear behind them. Sirin quickly turned around and pulled the gun from his belt and pointed it at the man, who raised his hands in surrender. “H-Hey I don’t mean any harm.” he said slowly walking towards them. “Stop walking.” Sirin said, when the man did Sirin gestured towards the knife and gun that were strapped to his sides and held out his free hand, “Give them to me” “I-I can’t” “If you don’t mean any harm then you won’t have any issue giving us your weapons now will you?” the man hesitated again and Sirin took another step closer, “Or I can kill you?” Garth reached out and touched his shoulder, “Calm down” Sirin nodded his head toward Garth “Weapons, now.” the man sighed and handed them to Garth “Sit down” he sat down on the ground “Why are you here?” “Well, my name is Rhett.” he held out his hand to Sirin “Ok Rhett why are you here?” he sighed and dropped his hand “Um, I saw you guys when you ran into the woods after leaving that compound, and so I followed you guys and saw you putting up a camp and surviving, and I thought you guys would be perfect to be in my community.” “Your community?” Garth asked. Rhett nodded, “Yep, I have a community a couple miles away, we have about ninety-four people living in it, but we are always looking for new members and as long as you will contribute to the community, you are welcome.” “No,” Sirin said finally. Garth grabbed his arm and pulled him away from Rhett, “What do you mean, no?” “What if this isn’t real, what if it is a trap and they just want to torture and eat us or something?” Garth smiled “Look I know you have trust issues, but nobody is going to eat us.” “It’s not funny Garth, what if this actually happens.” “It’s not going to happen ok?” “Whatever, I don’t want to go.” “Ben needs a safe place where he can grow up, more importantly, you need a place where you can heal and get better.” Sirin sighed “You really like this kid, don’t you?” Garth smiled “He’s a good person, just give him a chance, I mean you don’t really have a choice, he’s family now,” Sirin sighed and rolled his eyes. Family, he hated that word, but nodded and turned to leave, “Wait, I’ll talk to Rhett about his community, you get some sleep ok?” Sirin shook his head “No I can-” “Just, please stop being so stubborn and go to sleep.” Sirin rolled his eyes “Yeah, fine.” he walked to the tent. Garth could hear him move the sleeping bag to the other side to be as far from Ben as possible. He walked back to Rhett and sat down. “So, this community of yours…..” Garth trailed off “We have roughly ninety- four people, like I said, but our leader is always looking for more people to rescue and you guys would be a great addition.” “Yeah, see you keep saying that but you haven’t told us anything about your community.” “Well, we are a farming community, we have food, medicine, weapons.” “Why do you guys want to bring more people in? Especially people you don’t know?” “Our leader wants us to find as many people as we can so that we can…..” he trailed off “Anyways, I have been following you guys and listening and watching, you’re good people.” “So that’s all we have to do, just show up?” Rhett laughed, “Of course not, if you come back with me our leader will meet with you, you will be interviewed and given and physical and psychological evaluation, and if everything checks out, we’ll welcome you. You’ll get a place to live, food rations, you’ll be a citizen.” “Why all of the tests?” Rhett hesitated, “We just want to make sure that um, the people we let in are, you know healthy.” Um...okay. Garth thought but he didn’t say anything. He looked at his watch, 1:00. “Ok, come on.” he stood up and brought Rhett to a tree and tied him to it “Sorry I have to do this, but I don’t fully trust you yet and I want to go to sleep so, goodnight I guess.” “Uh, really?” “Yep, see you in a while.” Garth walked away and went inside the tent. “I don’t trust or like that guy,” Sirin said, sitting up. Garth laid down next to him, “You're supposed to be asleep.” “Whatever, can’t sleep, but seriously, did you hear how many times he said um?” “Once?” “Yeah and that’s once too many.” Garth pulled Sirin down and wrapped an arm around his chest “You need to calm down.” “How am I supposed to calm down?” he half-yelled “Shhh, you’re gonna wake up Ben.” Sirin sat up, “I need to go for a walk.” Garth sat up too. “Hey I’m sorry.” “No it’s fine I just need to calm down, like you said.” Garth wrapped his arms around him again and kissed his shoulder. “Let me help?” Sirin sighed, and layed back down, “Are you gonna give Ben a say in if we go or not?” “Of course, he’s a kid, kids have instincts.” “I’m not a kid.” Ben said rolling over. “Ben, how old are you?” “Sixteen, and what do I get a say in?” “There’s a guy outside and he wants to take us to his community I want to go and Sirin doesn’t so I guess you’re the tie breaker.” Ben sat up “You're going to let me choose?” Garth smiled “Sure, we’re pretty much a family now” “Really?” Garth smiled again and nodded “Now let’s get some sleep”


	7. Chapter 7

Ben rolled over and closed his eyes, Sleep, sleep. He told himself, but no matter how hard he tried, his mind kept going back to what Garth had said, all his life he wanted a family now he finally had one, well kind of, he would still have to learn more about Garth and Sirin, but as of right now he had a family. He rolled over again and opened his eyes, he saw Garth and Sirin laying together. Weird. Ben had noticed them being close before but this was different. He watched as Garth whispered something to Sirin that made him blush and grab Garth’s hand, “Hey guys, is everything ok?” Ben asked. Sirin let go of Garth’s hand and covered his face. “Uh, yeah everything’s fine.” Ben sat up, “You guys, if we are going to be a family we need to talk to each other.” Garth sat up as well and looked at Sirin, “He’s right.” he took his hands off his face and looked up at the ceiling, “Fine, Garth and I are together.” he said hurriedly. His confession was followed by awkward silence so Ben decided to say something to “I’ve, um never had a family, before all this, I was in and out of foster homes and decided to run away, then the apocalypse happened and I was kidnapped by J.P’s group.” Garth nudged Sirin in the ribs several times, “Yes Garth, I know.” “You know what?” Sirin looked at Ben “When I was a kid, I got taken away from my parents and lived in a foster home, then when I turned eighteen they kicked me out and I joined the army.” “See, you guys are bonding,” Sirin rolled his eyes “So both of you guys were in the army?” Ben asked “Yep, and that’s where we met J.P” Sirin stood up, “We might as well have Ben decide if we are going to go now.” They went outside to find Rhett untied and laying on the ground next to another man. “Garth, I thought you tied him up, and who’s this?” Sirin said angrily “I did that guy must have come and untied him,” Sirin walked to where they were lying and jabbed Rhett in the side with his boot, “Get up, you and your friend, we need to talk.” They got up, “Why the fuck is he untied and who are you?” Sirin asked “I’m Erik, and why did you have him tied to a tree?” “So, that he didn’t kill us” “I untied him, and we didn’t kill you, you guys are going to have to trust us” Rhett stepped in. “I thought you guys were supposed to be army, why didn’t you hear me being untied?” Garth blushed, “We were...sleeping.” he rolled his eyes “Whatever you made a decision yet?” Gath and Sirin looked at Ben, who nodded excitedly, “Yes, let’s do it” they packed up and started walking deeper into the woods, with Garth and Erik in the front. Sirin walked close to Ben and Rhett kept his distance from all of them, “Why did you decide yes?” Sirin asked after a while. Ben smiled “Because we need somewhere safe and it’s not like we are forced to stay, we can just go and check it out, also I really want to see you beat that Rhett guys ass.” Sirin smiled and punched him playfully in the shoulder. Maybe this family thing could work out after all.  
….  
“Hey, so can you tell me a little about your community?” Erik nodded “What do you want to know” “Rhett said that we will have jobs?” “Yes, you will be tested and then you will get a job that best suits you, you will get a house, food. People will accept you.” he said the last part quietly. Garth cleared his throat, “Is there anything you need to know about us?” “Actually, I don’t know any of your names.” “Well, I’m Garth,” he turned back to look at Sirin and Ben, “and that’s Sirin and Ben.” Erik nodded again “So, they’re your...?” “It's complicated” “Well, should talk about it because that is one of the questions you’ll have to answer at the community.” “Yeah ok” All of the questions that we will have to answer seems a little weird. Garth swallowed his doubt, if Ben wanted to make it work, then they would.  
….  
“Ugh, are we there yet?” Ben asked for about the fiftieth time, “No, just like the last time you asked and the time before that, and the time before that, and the time before that-” “I get it,” Ben waited about twenty seconds before asking again, “Hey, Sirin?” “What” “Are we there yet?” he asked with a smile, “Ben I swear to god, if you ask that question one more time, I will turn this car around” he yelled, smiling back. Everyone stopped walking to look at them, and Erik shot them a look, Ben waved then flipped him off. “That guy needs to loosen up.” Sirin chuckled “You’re right, but you probably be at least fake nice right now.” Ben sighed “Fine dad, way to take away the fun.” they walked in silence for a bit longer, until Ben asked, “Actually, speaking of dads, are you mine? I mean, am I your and Garth’s you know, kid now?” “If you want to be.” Ben thought about it for a minute, “Yeah, sure” Sirin smiled and ruffled his hair. He looked forward to see Rhett staring at them, Sirin furrowed his brow “Something I can help you with?” he looked away “No, sorry” “These guys are weird,” Ben whispered “I know, let’s just hope not everyone in the community is like this.”


	8. Chapter 8

“How much farther?” Garth turned to Erik “Not much. About two miles to our car, then about a thirty mile drive, You might want to go talk to Ben and Sirin now.” Garth nodded and walked back to them “Hey guys” Garth said when he got to them “Hey what’s up?” “Um,” he started, not knowing how to ask what type of family they were, he knew that Sirin didn’t do relationships or new things very well, and this was both. “Oh I almost forgot to tell you, Ben’s our son now.” Garth blinked, taken aback. “Unless, you don’t want me I mean, if you don’t I can stay somewhere else or something” Ben quickly said after Garth didn’t respond. Sirin stopped walking and put a hand on his shoulder “Garth, you ok?” Garth nodded and hugged him “So, everything’s good?” he pulled away and hugged Ben “Everything’s great.” they continued walking “So how’s Erik? Is he, like a total drag?” “No, actually he’s a just serious and determined guy, who probably cares a lot about people without showing it. He’s a lot like you” he said nudging Sirin “So, a total drag?” Ben quipped “That’s it you’re grounded,” Sirin said back. Garth laughed, “We are going to walk to their car, then it’s about a thirty mile drive to the community, before you ask how much longer” he said looking at Ben. 

….

They all piled into Erik’s car, with him driving and Rhett into the passenger seat. Sirin rested his head on Garth’s shoulder and grabbed his hand as they started driving. “So, Erik tell us more about your community.” Ben said “Ok, what do you want to know?” Ben looked a little disappointed that he answered but didn’t miss a beat. “Will we get a house or something?” He nodded, “After you are interviewed, our leader will assign you jobs, then you get a house based on the jobs you have,” “Are there any other people my age?” “Yeah, I think our leaders daughter and some other kids are about your age.” Ben sat back in his seat, apparently out of questions, and they rode the rest of the way in silence. Sirin watched as they approached a large community, guarded by a large steel wall, the gate opened and Erik unrolled the window “We’re back, and we brought visitors.” he shouted out the window and the people on the guard posts started talking and someone ran toward the big house in the center of town. Rhett, Sirin, Garth, and Ben got out of the car, while Erik drove it over to a lot and walked back to them. Shortly after an older woman walked toward them, smiling. “Hello, my name is Diane Montgomery and welcome to Secord. Let’s begin the interviews immediately, starting with you.” she pointed to Sirin and motioned for him to follow her. She led him into the house she came from, then into an office and sat down behind a desk. Sirin sat down in a chair directly across from her, she pulled out a pad of paper and a pen. “Name?” she asked “Sirin Moore” she wrote it down then said, “What are you?” ”Um, what do you mean?” “Are you Mr., Doctor,?” “Lieutenant” “You were in the army?” he nodded she wrote that down to. “Age?” “Twenty-two” “Are you married?” “No.” “Kids?” “One”  “How old is your…?” “Son, and he’s sixteen.” “Are you lazy?” “No” she continued asking him questions then put her pen down and said, “Ok, can I have a brief life history?” “Why?” “I just want to know more about you, get a feel for your personality.” “Fine, when I was little, my parents died so i was put into foster care, the foster home that adopted me was abusive, so when I turned eighteen I joined the army to get away from them. That’s where I met Garth, then later we adopted Ben.” “And you and Garth aren’t married?” “No,” “Ok, thank you, Now is time for the physical part of your interview, follow me.” she lead him out of the office and into another room. “Ready for the physical part already?” Rhett asked. Sirin looked at him quizzically, “You're the doctor?” Rhett smiled and nodded. Diane left the room and Sirin sat on the medical table, “So what does this physical include?” Rhett stood up, “I just have to make sure that your body is in good shape and all of your organs are healthy.” Sirin nodded, so Rhett stood up and washed his hands. He walked over to the table, “Ok, let's get started.”

….

Diane came back outside and walked up to Garth, “Your turn.” she said and he followed her into the house, then the office. She sat back down at her desk and flipped the page on her pad of paper, “Name?” “Garth Taylor”... 

….

Ben sat down on the ground, “He has been in there forever.” he said to Garth, the sky had grown dark and they were still waiting for Sirin the finish, both of them had already done their interviews and once Sirin finished his, Diane would decide whether they were in or out. Garth started walking towards the main house, “They’re not gonna let you in” Ben shouted after him, Garth didn’t turn around. Ben sighed and layed back in the grass, looking up at the sky. After a while, he heard footsteps and sat up, propping himself up on his elbows. He saw Erik walking towards him, followed by a girl. Ben raised his eyebrows expectantly, “Ben, this is Mary, Diane’s daughter, she’s about your age so I’ll let you to talk.” he walked over to the wall and climbed on top of one of the guard posts. Ben laid back down, “So, Mary…” he trailed off “Look, I know this might be a little awkward so, I am having a party tomorrow night, come or don’t.” “How are you having a party if we are the only kids here?” “We aren’t the only kids here, there’s four more. Its at my house you know, the big one.” Ben nodded and Mary walked away. He heard some of the men on the wall talking, “How long have you been on shift?” “Fifteen hours, give or take,” “Go home, Erik.” “I’m fine,” “No, you're not, Diane said go home.” he listened as Erik sighed and got climbed down off of the guard post.  _ It’s freezing, where are Sirin and Garth? _ Erik noticed him shivering, and walked over, “You can come to my house, you know if you’re cold.” “Um, okay. Thanks.” he followed Erik to a house that was at the back of the community, “Uh, come on in” he said awkwardly. Ben stepped into his house, “Thanks, it was just really cold out there, I don’t know how you guys do it standing up on the wall.” he whispered “You, um, don’t have to whisper, nobody else lives here.” “Oh, you're not married or anything?” “Nope, it’s just me,” his answer was followed by awkward silence, Erik cleared his throat, “Do you want something to eat or something to, um drink?” he asked walking into his kitchen. Ben followed him, “What do you have?” “Coffee.” “That’s it? All you have in this whole entire house is coffee?” Erik nodded “Wow I was right about you, you are a total drag.” Suddenly Erik’s door burst open and Rhett stormed in, “What the fuck Erik?” “What, what did I do?” Rhett stopped when he saw Ben, “Whatever, we’ll deal with this later.” he looked at Ben quizzically, then stormed out “What's his deal?” “I have no idea, but I'm pretty sure after you leave in going to get an earful” Erik answered, only halfway joking. Ben stayed for a little bit longer, “I should probably go, they'll be looking for me, so...thanks” Erik nodded and Ben walked out the front door


	9. Chapter 9

Garth saw Ben running toward them. “Hey where were you?” “Uh, I was at Erik’s house.” “Oh well he’s finally done” “And?” “We’re in, our new house is this way,” he said pointing. “Then what are we waiting for?” Ben took off running and entered the house that Garth had pointed to, Garth and Sirin following. When they came into the house, Ben ran downstairs, “I think we could make it work here.” he said, hugging Garth “Thanks guys.” he turned to hug Sirin “I’m good buddy,” he said ruffling Ben’s hair. “Ok, well we should go to sleep, tomorrow we get jobs and have to meet people, which I know is your favorite thing to do.” Garth said sarcastically, looking at Sirin “Ok, goodnight” Ben said going back upstairs. Garth smiled, “Goodnight”

….

“Good morning,” Diane said the next day, they were sitting in her office waiting to get their jobs. “I trust your accommodations were acceptable?” “Yes, thank you.” Garth said for them. “Ok, now for jobs, Sirin you will be going on runs, getting supplies. Garth, I can tell that you are a real people person, so you will be going out, and finding more people for our community” she turned to Ben “You know, the rest of the kids your age don’t work, you don't have to.” “I want to help.” he answered “Ok, since you're still a little bit young, you can start guarding the wall anytime, Erik is on shift.” Ben sighed, “Why Erik?” “He is the most experienced and he is in charge of all the guard's rotations and shifts. He has proven really useful since we found him.” and with that she dismissed them  to go and start working. 

….

Ben walked up to Erik, “Hey, um so I am supposed to be training with you to guard the walls,” he nodded “Yeah I heard, come on.” He motioned for Ben to follow him and they climbed the main guard post and sat down, after a few minutes of silence, Ben said “So, are going to train me or what?” “This is pretty much it, just watch until the next guy comes to take over your shift, if you see something threatening,” he pointed to the gun beside him “and if it doesn't stop alert the guys own there, and they will go tell Diane.” Ben sighed, realizing that this was going to be a very boring job, with a very boring person. “I'm not that bad,” Erik said as if he could read his thoughts. Ben rolled his eyes, “Yeah, sure. What time are you done with your shift?” “10:30. Why you got a date or something?” Ben ignored his question “10:30? You work a fourteen hour shift?” “Yeah that's all they will let me.” “All they will let you? What do you do in your free time?” “I, work at the infirmary, go on runs, or scout missions.” Ben shook his head.  _ He works way too much.  _ “You don't have to stay the whole time, guarding I mean, you can go anytime you want.” Ben shook his head “I can do it, but you better start talking because I am not sitting here for fourteen hours in silence.” Erik smiled “What do you want to know?”

….

Garth walked up to some guys that were hanging around the gate. “Hey, you must be Garth.” one of them said, he nodded. “I'm Nathan. I'm the leader of the scouts, and your new boss. This is Kal and Max. So do you know anybody here? What's your story?” “Um, no just Erik and Rhett found us in the woods and brought us here.” “Us? Who's us?” “Oh, Ben” he pointed to where he was on the wall, laughing and talking with Erik. “and Sirin” he pointed to where he was, surrounded by the guys in his group, looking uncomfortable and overwhelmed.  _ He’s hopelessly adorable. _ Garth thought as Sirin saw them looking over and waved. “Wow, he's hot, I mean I don't want to make you uncomfortable or anything but...wow.” “Um, yeah I think so too” Nathan stopped looking at Sirin long enough to shoot Garth a confused glance, “You think your brother is hot?” “He's not my brother.” “Oh…” Nathan still didn't stop looking at Sirin so Garth shoved his shoulder “Dude” he looked at Garth again “Sorry, should we uh, get to training?” “Yeah, we should.”

….

“You from around here?” Tripp, the guy in charge of runs, asked. Sirin nodded, “You grow up here? What were you before? You have a family? Why did your interview take so long?” Everyone started asking him questions at once. Out of habit, he looked over to where Garth was, he was looking at him too, so Sirin waved. Garth smiled and waved back. The other guys followed his eyes and saw him, “Who is that?” one of them asked.  “Oh, that's Garth,” he answered. “So, are you going to train me or what?” he said to avoid anymore questions. “Tripp nodded, “Yeah, let's go,” he motioned his head for Sirin to follow, and they started walking towards the gate. “Open up the gate.” Tripp yelled up to Erik, who was arguing with Ben about something. While Erik and was opening the gate, Sirin shot Ben a knowing glance. Ben rolled his eyes. “Be careful guys,” Erik said as they walked through. Tripp handed him a gun, “You ready?” “Yep probably more ready than you.” he said under his breath as he followed them into the woods. 

….

Erik sat back down next Ben, “So, back to my question earlier, you got a date with Mary?” Ben groaned, “Do you ever forget anything?” “Nope” “No, it's not a date it's just a party.” “A party?” “Just with some of the other people our age” “Sounds like you'll have fun, go ahead and leave early if you want,” “I don't know...I mean before the world ended I never fit in with other kids my age, so I don't know why this will be any different.” Erik touched his shoulder, “Just give them a chance, you'll never know, you might like them.” Ben smiled,  _ Maybe I was wrong about him. _

….

“Open the gates Erik.” Nathan shouted. Erik opened the gates and they walked out, following behind Tripp’s group. “What are we doing?” Garth asked “Tripp’s group is  going on a dry run today, so we are going to go with them, to get you used to the terrain.” “Ok” they ran to catch up to Tripp’s group. “Hey Tripp” Nathan said “Mind if we tag along so the rookie can get to know the terrain?” “No problem, that's what we are doing.” Nathan nodded, satisfied and walked over to Sirin. “Hi, I'm Nathan, you must be Sirin.” “Yep,” Garth walked to them and grabbed Sirin’s hand. “Hey,” Sirin turned his attention to Garth “Hi how are you?” Garth smiled “Good.” he answered “Did you see Ben today with Erik?” Sirin nodded “Yeah I'll have to make fun of him for it later.” Garth laughed “You’re such a good parent.” “Oh you have a kid?” Nathan cut in, pointedly asking Sirin “Yeah, we have a son.” He answered squeezing Garth's hand.

….

“No, I'm just saying that if it was fake I would have known” “That's not true it was so fake.” Ben laughed. He checked his watch “You want to leave?”  Erik asked, sounding a little disappointed. Ben nodded, “Sorry, but this was fun I'm glad, that uh, I got assigned to you or whatever.” He stood up to leave but stopped when they heard a shout and a gunshot in the distance. Erik grabbed his gun to look through the scope and saw Nathan  carrying someone in his arms. Erik handed the gun to Ben and opened the gates. “Go tell Rhett someone's hurt.” He yelled to one of the guys below. Erik opened the gates, “It's Garth” Ben yelled as Nathan got closer. He entered the gates and didn't stop running, straight to the infirmary. The rest of the guys came back not to much later and Tripp’s screaming attracted Diane and the rest of the people outside. “What is going on out here?” she yelled “Looks like gay boy here has a problem with the way that we do things” he yelled back gesturing towards Sirin. “Yeah I fucking have a problem, you don't know what the fuck you're doing and because of that someone might die.” He yelled back “Why'd you let these people in?” Tripp asked Diane, “You, know maybe because we actually know what we are doing.” Tripp turned around and swung at Sirin, who ducked and pushed him to the ground, before running to the infirmary. Tripp got up, “Tripp, my office, now.” Diane said and they walked back into her house. Ben turned to Erik, “I got-” Erik nodded “Yeah go ahead” Ben climbed down the guard post and ran into the infirmary. Sirin was pacing in the small entryway. “Ben” he said when he walked through the door. Ben hugged him, “What happened?” Sirin pulled away and went back to pacing, “Fucking Tripp, was trying to show off and shot him.” “Is he going to be ok?” Sirin shrugged “Rhett says, that we just need to give him time to work, about three hours.” Nathan came out of the room where Rhett was working, “What's happening?” Ben asked hopefully. “Rhett just keeps saying that he needs more time. I'm sorry you guys.” He said then left the building. “I'm sorry I-” Ben said, his voice breaking before he went outside and sat on the front step. He looked up and saw Tripp come out of Diane’s house covered in blood. Without thinking Ben shouted, and Tripp turned to him with wide eyes and started running after him with a knife. There was a shot, then it was Tripp’s turn to shout, and he fell onto the ground, clutching his leg. “What the fuck?” Sirin said as he ran outside “I-” Ben tried, right before he felt his knees collapse and his world went black.

….

“Erik!” Sirin shouted as Ben fell to the ground. Erik was already climbing down the guard post and ran over. “I'll take him to my house, you go tell Rhett about Tripp and go see why he is covered in blood.” Sirin nodded and went back inside. Erik picked Ben up bridal style and carried him to his house. He laid him down on the couch and got him a glass of water and a wet towel. Then he sat on the floor in front of the couch and brushed Ben's bangs off his forehead before placing the towel on and walking back to the kitchen.

….


	10. Chapter 10

Ben opened his eyes. He felt his heart race and he shivered. “This is all my fault.” he whispered. Erik came into the room “You're awake.” He said sitting on the couch next to him. He noticed Ben shaking, “Hey, what's wrong?” Ben didn't say anything, he just let his head fall into his hands and cried. Erik hesitated, then reached out and grabbed his hand. It wasn't passionate. It wasn't some heat of the moment, unable to resist type of thing. It was simple. It was comforting. It was the most natural thing in the world for him to twine their fingers together. Ben looked up, surprised but he didn't pull away. “A-any word on Garth?” Erik shook his head. “No, not yet.” Ben started crying again, “Sorry, I'm so sorry.” Erik squeezed his hand, “Sorry for what?” “It-It's my fault.” “What's your fault?” “That Garth for shot and now he might die, because of me” “How is it your fault?” “I was the one who told him to come here” “So? You couldn't have known that this was going to happen.” “I guess…..” he trailed off, still crying. Erik didn't say anything, he just sat there and held his hand. Ben's tears slowed down after a while, “You better?” Ben nodded and squeezed his hand before letting go. “Can I use your bathroom?” “Yeah, it's just down the hall.” Ben stood up and walked down the hall and Erik would be lying if he said he didn't watch him walk away. 

….

Sirin knocked on Erik's door, and waited for him to answer. While he waited he paced,  _ Calm down you're fine, Ben's fine, you're all fine. Not everyone.  _ A voice in the back of his head told him.  _ Stop, stop, stop it's...fine It's not fine what if he dies, you'll have no one you'll be all alone again. _ He felt his eyes well up and Erik stepped out. “You ok?” Sirin didn't answer “Tripp stabbed Diane, they are both in the infirmary now. I have to go on a run to get more medical supplies for Rhett, can Ben stay with you?” “Yeah of course” Sirin nodded and walked away. 

….

Erik walked back into his house, and saw Ben sitting at his kitchen bar,  _ Looks like he wasn't planning on leaving anytime soon, that should make this easier. “ _ Hey, Ben, Sirin has to go on a run, get more medical supplies.” “Ok, so can I stay with you?”  _ Easier than I thought,  _ “Yeah, of course” Ben nodded and turned back to the counter, “Hey, are you hungry?” “No,” “Well, do you want to eat anyways” “No” “Are you ok?” Ben started crying again “No, can I go to sleep?” “Yeah, come on.” he led Ben back into the livingroom. Ben laid on the couch while Erik went and got him pillows and blankets. “Here” Ben nodded his thanks and closed his eyes. “Night, Erik.” “Night”. Erik walked up stairs to his room and went to sleep as well. 

….

Erik woke up to Ben climbing into his bed. “Ben?” Ben jumped, then turned to look at him, “Oh, hi Erik, what are you doing here?” “This is my room?” Ben looked around the room, “Yeah, I guess it is.” “Are you drunk?” Ben laid down next to him, “Yeah, a tiny bit, Mary had a party tonight so I went and drank a little,” “Seems like you drank a lot.” Ben shrugged and scooted closer to him. “Are, you alright? You were really sad earlier today and then you went out and got drunk, you're only sixteen, that shouldn't happen.” “I'm ok, I guess” he moved closer to Erik again “I mean this whole Garth thing fucking sucks we don't know if he's gonna live, this community, it just feels weird, and you…” Ben didn't finish “What about me?” “I don't know, whatever.” Erik knew he was lying, but he didn't say anything else. Ben moved all the way over to him and hugged him tightly,”Ben-” Erik started as he pulled away. Ben looked up at him with  sad, watery eyes, “Please?” Erik sighed and let Ben pull him back into the hug.  _ When did I become a weak person who cuddles? _ He thought, but he still hugged him back, wrapping both arms around him and running a hand through his hair.  _ This is going to be awkward in the morning.  _

_ …. _

Erik woke up feeling Ben shift on top of him. He looked down to see his head resting on his chest and his arm wrapped around him, holding him tightly. Erik sighed and looked out the window, it was raining which meant that standing on the wall all day miserable. Ben moved again, loosening his grip on Erik and opening his eyes. He must have realized that he was hugging Erik because he sat up immediately. “Sorry, I think I got a little drunk last night.” “Yeah you did, but it's fine.” Ben nodded but he looked really embarrassed as he stood up and walked out of the room. 

….

The day passed just like the day before, except for Ben barely spoke to Erik. “Hey, can we talk?” he asked Ben after their shift was over and they went back to Erik’s house. Ben was sitting in the living room, reading. “I guess” he said not looking up. Erik sat down and Ben moved away from him. “Ben, I know that you are embarrassed about what happened but it doesn't matter, like at all” Ben didn’t say anything or even look up, Erik sighed, “Look, I know you are going through a hard time right now, but you don’t have to do it by yourself.” Ben didn’t look up from the book, but he said, “You don’t think it’s weird?” Erik shrugged, “Only if you make it.” Ben thought about it for a while, then nodded hesitantly, “Yeah okay.” Erik smiled and got up, “You haven’t eaten, do you want dinner?” Ben stood up too, “I thought all you had was coffee” “We are going to go over to Rhett’s house for dinner.” Ben groaned, “Why Rhett?” “He’s my brother, so once a week I am forced to have dinner with him,” “Oh, that sucks, and it seems like you don’t get along, so I will definitely come, I love fights.” Erik laughed “Ok, let’s go.”

….

Ben and Erik arrived at Rhett’s house about ten minutes later, and Erik stopped him before going inside, “I should warn you Erik and his family are a little different, so just be prepared to be judged on every little thing you do,” “What?” “Hey, you didn’t have to come” Ben rolled his eyes, “Whatever, how bad can they be?”  Erik opened the door and walked in, two kids sat on the floor, playing a game, while a woman held a screaming baby, she turned around when she saw them, “Good you're here, I have to go find Rhett, watch the kids for me, yeah?”  she didn’t wait for them to answer, and shoved her baby into Ben’s arms, she walked out of the house and slammed the door, which made the baby scream louder. “Um, what do I do with this?” Erik shrugged, “Just try to get him to calm down” Ben held the baby upright, and he started sucking on the collar of Ben’s tee shirt, “Gross, but at least he stopped crying.” Erik commented “Yeah, so who was that and who are they?” “Oh, right. This is Noah and Elizabeth, and Christopher, and that was Rhett’s wife, Carol.” Ben nodded then looked down when he felt a tug on his pant leg, “I’m hungry,” Noah said he held his arms up, wanting Ben to hold him, “Ok, let’s get you something to eat” Erik answered. He walked into the kitchen, followed by Noah and Elizabeth. Ben sighed and looked at the baby, who was devouring his shirt, “Do you think he’s hungry too?” he asked Erik as he walked into the kitchen, “Probably, hold on and I can make his food to.” Ben sat down and looked at the kids, they were eating spaghetti. “How old are you guys?” they each held up three fingers, “They’re twins.” Erik explained. They ate the rest of their meal in silence. Erik handed Ben a bottle and he fed it to Christopher, who fell asleep right after he was done. The twins fell asleep shortly after, leaving Erik and Ben to clean up their mess and then carry them upstairs to their bedroom. Ben laid Christopher down in his crib, silently praying that he stayed asleep, considering his shirt was still drenched in the baby’s saliva. He snuck out of the room and tiptoed down the hall, so he didn’t wake anybody. When he got to the living room, he collapsed onto the couch next to Erik, “Tired?” “I’m exhausted, not to mention I smell like baby spit and spaghetti. I thought we were supposed to be here to eat dinner with your family, not take care of their kids while they're off doing god knows what.” “I am so sorry, I had no idea that this is what was going to happen.” Ben sighed and laid his head on Erik’s shoulder “Do you think he’s going to die?” he asked quietly. Luckily, Rhett and Carol came in so Erik didn’t have to answer, Rhett looked at Ben quizzically, “Why is he here?” “He’s staying with me for a couple of days, while Sirin is on a medical run.” “Ok, get out.” Erik stood up, followed by Ben but Ben stopped walking halfway to the door, “How’s Garth?” Rhett didn’t answer, he just turned his attention to Erik, and asked. “Can I see you in the kitchen for a second?” He nodded and followed Rhett into the kitchen. Ben heard muffled yelling, then Erik came out of the kitchen, grabbed his wrist and pulled him out the door. Once they were back in Erik’s house, Ben asked the question he had been dreading all night, “He’s dead isn’t he?” “No, Rhett said he’s fine, he needs a couple days to heal and he should regain consciousness tomorrow.” “Really?” Erik nodded and Ben sighed in relief. “We should go to bed.” “Can I use your shower first?” “Yeah, go ahead there are towels under the sink.” 

….

Ben walked into Erik’s room half an hour later and shook him awake, “Hey” “What?” Erik didn’t open his eyes, “Where are all of your blankets?” Erik sighed sleepily and rolled over, “I took them to the laundry, sorry, I forgot. Just sleep in here.” Ben hesitated, then walked over to the other side of the bed and climbed in next  to Erik, “Hey” “What?” “Garth is really alive right? You weren’t lying?” “Yes he is alive.” “Then what was wrong earlier?” “Just something Rhett told me” “What was it?” “Tomorrow.” was all he said before he fell back asleep. Ben couldn't help but scoot closer to him, this is the type of friends Erik said they could be right? So, Ben found himself drawing closer to him, gently cuddling into him until he too, fell asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

Ben woke up the next day to the sound of scuffling in the room. “What are you doing?” he mumbled sleepily towards the direction he thought Erik was, “Huh? Oh sorry I didn’t mean to wake you up. I was just looking for something.” Ben opened his eyes and saw Erik going through his dresser, throwing out clothes everywhere. “Has Garth woken up yet?” “No, not yet. Maybe tonight.” Ben deflated a little bit but nodded. “Are you going to come and guard today?” “Yeah, why wouldn’t I?” “Because you’re sixteen and you could be spending more time with kids your age.” “I went to a party with them the other night, and frankly I had more fun with you last night then I did with them.” “You had more fun watching my brothers kids all night then you did being a teenager and doing teenager stuff?” Ben nodded and closed his eyes, “Can I go back to sleep?” Erik chuckled, “Sure buddy, go back to sleep.”

….

Erik had to hand it to him, Ben had endurance. It was his third day guarding the wall and he didn’t complain about it being boring once, though he did sigh longingly, when he saw Mary and a couple of her friends messing around in the square. When asked if he wanted to go to, he just shook his head and looked back out towards the woods. “Do you think there are others?” Ben asked him after a particularly long period of silence. “You came from a community of others.” Erik answered, “I know but, like the rest of the world, it can’t all be dead right?” “Right, there are probably tons of other groups and people who survived, just like us.” “Ever wonder why we are the ones who survived?” “Not really, probably just because we are the strongest or we just got lucky.” “Hey, what was wrong last night after you talked to Rhett?” “What? Oh just something he said, he was being stupid.” Ben rolled his eyes when he realized Erik wasn’t going to say anything else, “...Ok fine don’t tell me.” Erik smiled “Sorry, Ben it’s just not something I want to share.” Ben nodded in understanding and looked around, trying to avoid any awkwardness. Everyone was looking at him questioningly. He looked at Erik to see if he noticed it too, but he was oblivious. “Why is everyone staring at us?” he whispered after about fifteen minutes of feeling their eyes burn holes through him. Erik looked around and rolled his eyes, “Get back to work. Now.” he said loudly and everyone’s gaze snapped to what they were supposed to be doing. “You didn’t answer my question.” Ben pressed lightly, Erik scooted closer so no one could hear, then said, “Remember how you said that you don’t get along with people your age?” Ben nodded, “Well, it’s like that for me except I don’t get along with anybody. So, they are all staring at us because we are talking and I am being nice to you.” “So I’m am being stared at because you are a dick?” “Pretty much.” Ben laughed “Is that what Rhett was mad about last night?” Erik nodded and looked away, “Kind of.” “Kind of?” “I’ll just tell you later ok?” “Erik!” they turned around to see Rhett shouting from the porch of the infirmary, “Come here.” Erik rolled his eyes again and climbed down the guard post and walked to Rhett where was standing. Ben couldn’t hear anything they were saying, but there was lot of Rhett gesturing wildly and Erik was rolling his eyes. He didn’t even realize he was staring until Erik waved at him and smiled sweetly. Ben waved back, then turned around to what he was supposed to be doing. Sirin still hadn’t come back, but he was going to...hopefully.

….

_ He’ll be ok. _ Sirin repeated to himself, like a mantra.  _ Garth had to be ok. If he dies things will just go back to way they were before. No, they won’t, Garth is the only thing you love. So I can just go back to not loving things. You don’t want to. Our relationship was always kind of one sided anyways. No it wasn’t, you know that Garth loves you, he told you he did first.  _ He continued walking through the woods with the things for Garth in a satchel bag. He had been lucky this time. Only encountered about twenty of the sick, and no people. He hadn’t found everything that was on the list but he hoped it would be enough, it had to be enough. He felt guilty that this even happened, but he didn’t want to focus on that , he let his mind wander, and that’s how he ended up in a debate with himself whether it was worth it or not to even return. He knew he would return, but that didn’t stop him from thinking about just leaving. He got back to Secord at about eleven, Ben and Erik weren’t on shift, but Rhett ran out, “Is he awake?” “Yeah, go see him.” Rhett answered, uninterestedly. Sirin ran to the infirmary while Rhett went to Erik’s house. He walked inside without knocking and found Erik and Ben upstairs, laying in Erik’s bed. They were both asleep, Erik spooning behind Ben, holding him tightly. Rhett rolled his eyes and fought the urge to wake them up and make Ben leave. Instead, he sat down in the chair by the window and waited for them to wake up. It would take awhile, yes, but at least he would be able to observe his brother’s behavior with Ben. He didn’t like Ben from the start and he doesn’t need to become friends or anything more with Erik. 

….

Sirin entered Garth’s hospital room and saw him lying on the bed. He was pale, but Rhett had said that he was going to live. He crossed the room and grabbed Garth’s hand , “I’m sorry I wasn’t here when you woke up. I went out to look for any medicine that would help.” he said quietly. “It’s okay.” Garth scooted over so Sirin could sit down beside him, and held him with Sirin resting his head on Garth’s chest. “Hey Sir?” “Hm?” “Do you remember Clay and Lyla?” “From the base? Yeah.” “I heard Rhett and Diane talking and I think that Clay and Lyla are coming here. What are prenatal vitamins?” “There vitamins for pregnancy.” “Do you realize what this means? Clay and Lyla are coming here and Lyla is pregnant.” “Garth, that’s great and all, but you need to focus on getting better.” Garth ignored him. “Diane’s going to retire. She wants Rhett to take over for her.” “Really?” “Yeah, I think they said next week they will tell everyone.” “Garth no more talking, rest.” “I have been resting for two days.” “Please?” “Fine, hey Sir?” “What?” “I love you.” Sirin smiled and kissed his cheek. “Love you too.”


	12. Chapter 12

“Do you think Rhett’s ok?” Ben asked later that day, they were sitting on the couch at Erik’s house, watching Star Wars on the old TV. “I think he’s fine, just a little pissy about…” Erik trailed off. “About what,” “Nothing, it doesn’t matter.” Ben paused the TV. “Oh are we playing the ‘let’s be an immature little bitch instead of facing our problems’ game? I love that one!” “I don’t want to make things weird between us.” Ben leaned up and  _ licked _ across Erik’s mouth. “Ew, Ben. What the hell?” “Now things are awkward between us. You can say your thing now?” Erik nodded, hoping Ben didn’t see him lick his lips. He didn’t do it on purpose, it was subconscious. “Rhett doesn’t think that we should hang out.” “Why?” “You don’t know this about me-” “I don’t know a lot about you.” “I had a fiance that cheated on me, it was after, but she was going to marry me and was still cheating on me. Rhett is worried that I’ll become...attached to you. His exact words were ‘You can’t love him. It’s wrong’” Ben was quiet for a moment, “Was she is hot? I’m just asking because, I mean look at you.” “Yeah, but that doesn’t matter.” Ben raised his hand and put it over Erik’s heart, “I’m sorry she hurt you, you’re not going to stop being friends with me right?” “No, my brother is an asshole. I don’t need to listen to him.” “Can we get to know each other?” Ben asked, not moving his hand off Erik’s chest “Sure, just take turns telling each other things?” Ben nodded and Erik got up, getting a beer from the kitchen. “My fiance’s name was Rachel.” he said after he sat back down. “Kids bullied me when I was in school, it got so bad I had to move schools.” “What did they bully you for?” Ben bit his lip and looked down. “Come on buddy, you can tell me anything.” “It would make things weird.” “You licked my mouth, things are already weird.” “They bullied me because I was gay. They would write ‘gay boy’ and ‘faggot’ over all my stuff and tell everyone I liked to take it up the ass. Beat me up after school.” “What did your parents do?” “My parents did worse. My dad was drunk all the time and would take all his anger out on me. My mom was on drugs and went to jail before I was in school. I was locked in a closet, and he beat me until I couldn’t walk.” Erik took Ben’s arm and pulled up his sleeve. He had several scars from cutting on his wrist. “Is this because of that?” “Yeah.” Ben sighed, and grabbed the beer from Erik’s hands, taking along drink, “Your turn.” “I’ve never been in love before, not even with my fiance. I loved her, but I wasn’t in love with her, if that makes sense. I realized it after she cheated on me.” “I’ve never kissed anyone before.” “Really?” Ben punched him, “Shut up.” Erik looked at his watch, “It’s getting late, want to finish the movie?” “Yeah,” Ben said, pushing play and taking another drink, this time sitting closer than before. Erik took the bottle from Ben, setting it on the coffee table and pulling Ben into his lap. He learned quickly that Ben loved touches. Ben cuddled closer and before long he was asleep. Erik held him tighter, trying to figure out why he had pain in his chest from what he had just learned about Ben. He couldn’t imagine anyone wanting to hurt him, why would they?

….

Ben woke up the next day on Erik’s couch, curled up in his lap. Ben yawned and punched Erik awake when he saw a cat looking at them from the coffee table. “Ow, good morning to you to.” Erik said, rubbing his arm. “You didn’t tell me you have a cat” “What? Oh yeah I have a cat.” Ben scooped the cat into his arms and held it close. “I haven’t seen a cat in so long, what’s it’s name?” “Alchemy.” Erik mumbled out, laying back down. “Alchemy.” Ben repeated “Like the comic book villain?” “Yes, now be quiet.” he whispered. But Ben didn’t listen, he started talking to Alchemy quietly, saying things like, “You’re not a villain kitty, you’re sweet. Don’t listen to what Erik says, he’s just grumpy because I called him on being a little bitch last night.” Ben threw a smirk in Erik’s direction, expecting to get one back, but instead he got a look of fondness and a smile. “What?” “You're cute.” Ben rolled his eyes “Whatever. What are your plans for today?” “I have to go guard.” he said, rolling over. Ben thanked whatever God there was that Erik didn’t make things awkward after he learned that Ben was gay. He barely had a reaction, which showed Ben that he really didn’t care, it didn’t affect their relationship at all. “Do you want me to guard with you?” he asked shyly, he definitely wanted to, but didn’t want to come off as clingy or annoying. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I?” Ben shrugged and put Alchemy on the floor, “Don’t you want to hang out with someone else?” “No, why would I? There’s no one else that I feel comfortable with as easily as you, or can talk about space and Star Wars and comic books.” “You don’t find it annoying that I want to cuddle all the time?” “A little.” Erik said honestly “but not enough to make me stop hanging out with you or to make me not cuddle with you.” Ben laughed “You like it, don’t you?” “Shut up.” Erik got up, “I’m going to go take a shower.” “I’m going to go home, see you later.” Ben stood up, “Would it weird if I hugged you.” “You literally licked my mouth last night. Come here.” Ben crossed the room and Erik hugged him tightly. “I’ll see you later buddy.” Erik went upstairs to shower. 


	13. Chapter 13

Six weeks. Six weeks since Garth woke up, six weeks since Clay and Lyla arrived, six goddamn weeks since Erik and Ben became...whatever they are. To say that Rhett was pissed would be an understatement. He was supposed to be the leader already and if things had worked out the way he wanted, Clay and Lyla wouldn’t even be there and Ben sure as hell wouldn’t be as close as his was to Erik. He had to stay calm or something bad was going to happen. It would all work out, he was becoming leader today and he would fix everything. He stepped out onto the stage in the church, “Hello everyone, thanks for coming, as you know my name is Rhett, and I am your new leader.” he looked around at everyone that was gathered and saw Erik sitting in the back, watching him intently. Then Ben walked in and put his hand on Erik’s shoulder and his face lit up immediately. Erik moved so that Ben could sit beside him and Ben rested his head on Erik’s shoulder as they listened to the rest of what Rhett has to say. “I am your new leader.” he repeated. “There will be no more jobs, I will assign you were I think you’ll best fit on a day to day basis.” lots of people murmured in response, but Rhett didn’t listen, he was busy watching Erik and Ben who were talking to each other quietly, Ben blushed and Rhett had enough. He finished his speech and then told Erik to stay behind. “I am choosing you to go on a scouting mission. We are going to need any medical supplies you can find, as well as food and clothes.” Erik nodded “I can leave tonight, just let me pack a bag.” “Thanks Erik.” he went home and threw clothes into a bag, then went to the wall to say goodbye to Ben. Ben saw him come over and climbed down the guard post, “Hey, how come you’re not on guard?” “I actually came to talk to you about that, um Rhett is making me go on a run today, I’ll just be gone for a couple of days, but I just wanted to come and say goodbye.” Ben looked sad, maybe more sad than he should look, but he hugged Erik tightly, ignoring the looks they got from the others. Erik pulled him behind the main post, so they were out of sight and hugged Ben, not worrying about pulling away. “Do you want me to get you anything?” Ben smiled, “Grape soda and blankets. Also movies, oh and books, preferably comic books or medical textbooks.” “Ok buddy.” he could tell there was something Ben wanted to say, “What is it?” “I’m going to miss you. I don’t have anybody else.” “You have Sirin and Garth, maybe hang out with Mary and Josh, but if I die-” “You won’t.” Ben shook his head as he said it, and a tear fell. Erik kissed the corner of his mouth, “If I do, here.” Erik took the chain from around his neck and gave it to Ben, there was a silver band on the end that looked like it would fit him, but was too small for Erik’s fingers “My brother Aaron gave it-” “Don’t. Tell me when you get back.” 

….

Erik woke in a cell. He didn’t know how long it had been or where he was, just that the place was an old prison and he couldn’t remember how long he had been there. Erik opened his eyes and saw that he had a chain around his neck and his leg stung like a bitch when he tried to walk. A man walked over to him, grabbed the chain and started walking, down the hall and stopped at a large steel door. He entered the room and saw someone sitting in a chair at the back. He was led to a chair right across from him and was told to sit. Erik remained standing, locked in a stare off with the man "Kneel" he grumbled out, low but calm. Erik's gaze didn't waver. "Kneel" he said again, this time with more force upon it. He reached forward and grabbed the chain hanging from Erik's neck, giving it a hard tug. He fell forward and, with his hands tied behind his back, wasn't able to stop his head from smacking into the chair. He felt a crack and blood gushed from his nose, staining the concrete floor. "That's better" he growled, leaning back in his chair. Erik kept his face on the floor, deciding it would be better for him to look at anything but the man “Where are you from?” Erik didn't answer and he started laughing quietly to himself, “Protecting someone?” he stayed silent “It doesn't matter, they will forget you, just like I will make you forget them.” Erik grit his teeth but remained on his knees. He couldn't lose control. Not now. “You know, we re going to be spending a lot of time together, might as well get used to being with me.” Erik tensed and shot up, eyes brimming with hatred. He cringed as his weight resettled on his injured knee but kept leaning back until his spine was straight and he glared into the man’s eyes. “I’m gonna kill you.” He leaned forward and gripped Erik's face, nails digging into his cheek and scratching just deep enough for a small trickle of blood to come free. "You? You can barely walk and you're going to kill me?” he laughed, a deep and cruel sound. He waved over one of his men and before Erik could register what was happening, he was being shoved roughly back down. He felt a painful stab at the base of his neck and he groaned. It felt like liquid fire was being injected into his bloodstream. It coursed through his body and he reared back, a scream ripping itself from his throat. He stared at the ceiling as the pain began to subside and realized that he could now see everything in a sharp clarity. Moments later, he sunk back to the ground and blackness overwhelmed him. Erik woke with his head throbbing painfully. “Where am I?” the man laughed, “I’m Ezra.” he walked over and placed a hand on Erik’s chest, Erik was strapped down, tied at his hands and feet. He noticed that they had moved to another room, apparently underground. He was laying in just his boxers. “You know, if I swung the other way…” Ezra rubbed his arms, then pulled out a scalpel. He stated cutting over his abs in long, vertical lines going from the bottom of his ribs to a little underneath the waistband of his boxers. Erik screamed out in pain and pulled at his restraints. “I saw you in the woods, Erik. Do you want to know why I brought you here?” Erik nodded furiously, trying not to pass out. “I have a community here, and we have a very specific way of doing things. We have been through so much and then there’s people like you, who have had it easy since the beginning, probably had it easy even before. So we are here to show you what it means to hurt, to struggle, but we’ll never let you die, after you are suitably scarred and know how it feels to be scared and broken and lost, we will let you go, back to where ever you were from, afraid and damaged. Now, down to business, when we captured you, you had two cans of grape soda and med school text books. Who were those for?” there was no way Erik was bringing Ben into this, so he lied. “They were for me.” “Then why didn’t you drink the soda?” “I had three cans to begin with, I already drank one.” Ezra started pacing, but he was more amused than angry. “I don’t believe you. I think you know what is going to happen if you tell me the truth, and you’re scared. That shows me that you care about whatever it is a lot, probably more than you should.” “H-how did you know that?” Ezra laughed, “I interrogated prisoners of war before this. You are easy.” 


End file.
